Ski Gymnastik

I also didn't mention that I'm in a Ski Gymnastics club. Every Monday from 7-8pm, I get my dose of sweaty Austrian. From ages 14 to 74, a whole bunch of community members get together in a small gym and around a large square of blue wrestling mats lined up edge to edge, we do exercises that will prepare us for a rigorous winter of skiing.

Never judge a book by its cover, right? But my puritan background was aghast at the sight of manly flesh paraded before my eyes. You see, Austrians (and all Europeans) have a slightly different uptake on the human body. Rather than fear, cover up, and nonchalantly deny the fact that they have male and female parts, they flaunt. Imagine a rooster, proudly shaking his variegated tail feathers without a guilty conscience. Austrian men don't mind tight clothing. Preferably on the bottom. Spandex, I'm sure, made it's way into the Austrian language way before the English one. In fact, it must be from the Latin and Rome is pretty darn close to Austria. Relatively speaking.

All fear and loathing is but a distant thing; a part of myself that's long been dead, voicing thoughts only out of habit. I take this transparent monologue and listen like I listen to radio at work - with half a mind. It's funny and I'm sure a lot of you would chuckle with me just at the sheer brazen and proud manner of these Austrian men, who are always on the richer side of 50 (sorry, girls). This is the culture, this is the life here. Sometimes, I feel much more relaxed. Who really cares, if there is more shape than shadow to that man? Eh? Who cares if that woman divorced her razor a few months back? Eh? Humanity. Sweating, bouncing, moving, hairy humanity. It's beautiful.

At least I think so.

Don't take me wrong. I'm not heroic. Just because I see a Picasso and admire it on the wall does not mean I want to buy it. It's beautiful, regardless of whether or not I want to take it home and beauty will always have my appreciation, at the least. But on the other hand, a Franz Marc... Lines, shadow, grace... Wallet is in the hand. Yes'um, my wallet is in the hand.